Two black boys
Are looking through a train window
They are laughing and beautiful and young.
Too young to accept
What America already thinks if them
Already taking away their freedom to become.
Already making them guilty and nigga.
I’d like to say I have not accepted that.
But nowadays I only roll my eyes when hearing another brown skin
be made victim to hate.
I’ve stopped turning in my sleep.
my eyes no longer tear.
Though a heavy want still rests in the back of my throat.
There is little dream of freedom and therefore no fight.
Deep down I believe this is how it is and
I’ve thought little of how this can change.
But these two boys do not know yet.
They are a revolution.
Brown bodied and brilliant
They are laughing and beautiful and young
They are looking out of the train window and this is normal for them.
No gunshots or stab wounds
No white standard telling them they’re less than.
No cop’s standing over beaten black bodies like ritual
They are here, they are possible.
Their brown legs look like exclamation points
And their eyes are saying “I want to be”
What a wild and rambunctious declaration!
One that overrides all expectation of them
One that is imperative, just because…
they were fashioned from God
And I agree!
And I want to fight,
And I want to dream this life into truth.
And I want to be this truth..
Be black and bountiful
I will unroll my eyes…
I will cry tears…
I will turn in my sleep
I will cough up the heavy in my throat
so that you may have the freedom
R Wilson (c) 2014
We were the universe together.
a river both beginning and
and we stretched out so far past every sky
we did not notice
saw each other
for the first time.
we were too much of not ready.
too much of fools.
bargaining love for
all the things that looked like
And we were still love, but not enough. like stars,
bright and beautiful
but inevitably destroyed
We passed each other by.
Though we did not realize our choice.
now a backwards spindle
unraveled us into a quiet
(c) 2014 R Wilson
"but there are people walking without them"
is the thought that came to mind
while watching one of those fabulous shoe website commercials
the ones where some woman is drooling…
literally drooling buckets of saliva
or making orgasmic sounds
or breakdancing on the kitchen table.
for a bunch of shoes.
I mean it’s a bunch of shoes that only cost $39.99 each
and you will be the envy of all your friends
and you will drive your husband/boyfriend/some random guy insane
because you’ll eventually have closets and closets of heels for every
and everyone will love you and want to be you
and there are people walking around without shoes.
in the millions
feeling each cobblestone and sanded floor
swallowing glass and puddle between their toes
and becoming whatever magic they’re destined for… and they would find
joy in just one pair.
just one pair of shoes…
would satisfy the quench in their spirits even without the envious friends
or the closet space.
(c) 2014 RW
is playing in my background.
And I’m thinking…
I don’t know any sad jazz songs
to blanket these feelings I have.
So I google:”Angry Jazz Song That Will Comfort A Strange Heart Grieving A Boy Lost to Systemic Racism”
I google:”Song that will soothe the painful aches that hit the back of my throat oh so familiar when I don’t know what to say”
Song that will help me to feel. One that will remind me that feeling is not enough.
This is not our first time crossing these cotton fields
We have fought off more…and the scars on our backs from their footsteps prove it…
and we have a right for justice
our ancestors left enough trail mix to find it and claim it as home
but home…looks more graveyard than place mat.
and another young boy found his face on the pavement.
and his dreams were second place
and this is how it always goes.
and no black boy is safe…
and no black mind can rest.
Google never answers my questions.
Leaves my screen blank as though in a disarray as to why I would assume its help
I am an in disarray still…wondering where to go from here.
Me a black child on the other side of the states…wants to weep for Mike Brown…but knows the salt in my tears cannot flavor the taste of this evil.
it cannot make this less normal. After Diallo…I stopped believing in existence being anymore screwed than this.
Miles davis takes one last blow of he horn
The “so what” piece fades to black…
the so what piece fades to black
And i fight not to do the same.
on a night that stretched
round the earth twice
my heart was
sticking all over the dance floor
trying to hiccup love
out of every song
like it would be enough
to quench the thirst
of want tickling
the rib of mine that
used to lean
as though it were his own.
My hips swung
back and forth
as if the beat
were my freedom
as if the beat said…
as if it said
"you will be okay
and that would be enough.
But lonely is one hell
of a drug.
eventually left me in a corner
watching the flickering
lights and the bodies
that swayed together
while I drenched
in a dark that had no on switch.
(c) 2014 RW
I almost kissed another lover.
Almost fell into an ocean’s chest
carrying all of the love letters
and disappointment on my back
with my fingers clawing at the wind
because my true love is not true
and it’s everyone’s
fault why I’m
And don’t nobody want to be alone
when it’s hot.
We want popsicles
and tube tops
and long kisses
and sticky hands
holding together til the sweat
lay a covenant of body and
and we are in more
ways than one—
We want love that
makes sunsets out of our
out of our mouths
like grapes from
spilling all over our
shirts in excess
Even if it’s not love and
we don’t call it that—we call it that…
Making laughter and skin so necessary to
touch even if by accident.
And I accidently almost tripped into a firmament of my tears
arms still holding all the memory of marriage and children and xxx rendezvous
I mean thoughts…
I mean thoughts become memory when you believe them…
they weren’t mine to believe and I shouldn’t have thought so…
and it felt like everyone’s fault why I didn’t realize
and I may never realize it
But you, summer, are a thousand smiles…
and my heart, a creaking door…
could not close fast enough before
your sun-rays sent my brown legs
running into the arms
of a beautiful day.
(c) 2014 R W